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Crazy title, I know! Most of the time we hear things like "You have to demand respect" or "You have to give respect in order to receive it" but I have never been the kind of person to fight for people to respect me. It always seemed exhausting especially when some people would much rather disrespect you and validate it by sayings like "she doesn't deserve respect" or "If you want respect you have to give it"
In the beginning of my interactions with people I act accordingly. I am a kind and intelligent woman and considering the fact that I haven't spent time with whomever it is I'm meeting, there isn't much for us to stand on besides a simple Hello.
Think about it, what could this person have done to make me give them respect. Have they shown me something. No, we just met.
So here are my 5 logic's behind why you shouldn't demand respect.
"It's easy for a person to pretend to be something they aren't, but its even easier when they know exactly what role to play to get to you."
-Shae-
1. It's a waste of time
You don't have to agree but I truly believe it is a waste of time to demand anything from anyone; time, attention you name it. To fight for someone to do something, like treat you with respect is time wasted. You are more than capable of investing that time elsewhere, into yourself or into people who you don't have to convince of your value.
2. People don't respect themselves
Often times I find that people project how they feel about themselves onto others. Insecurities breed jealousy and traits of jealousy are gossip, drama and a mean attitude. These traits show in how you treat others. Examine an individual who is disrespectful and examine how much they respect themselves, now if you find that this individual doesn't respect themselves, there's no fighting for them to do something for you that they can't do to/for themselves.
3. You can't change people
This has been one of my most freeing lessons in life. Learning that I can't control people and learning that it's best to let go of the idea that I can. It's a responsibility that does more harm in holding us back than good by having less worry.
4. You're Responsible
Ultimately you are responsible for whom you allow in your life. If they aren't conducive to your growth, healthy mental and emotional state than its your job to cut weeds and nurture a healthy environment for yourself.
5. It won't work in your favor
This is one of the worst things to have to learn the hard way. When you try to convince someone to be "respectful" or what you want/need them to be you could be handing over the wrong person the blueprint to how to hurt you.
It's easy for a person to pretend to be something they aren't, but its even easier when they know exactly what role to play to get to you.
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Blog Author: La' Shae Alexander
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